The Project: Kuwait

Psyched with Dr. D: Essra Al Bloushi ( @octaprenuer ) Shares her Covid-19 Story, From the Lasting Effects on her Father, to the Impact on her Children.

November 19, 2020 Essra Al Bloushi ( @octaprenuer ) Mahdi Al Oun, Dr.D, Season 1 Episode 208
The Project: Kuwait
Psyched with Dr. D: Essra Al Bloushi ( @octaprenuer ) Shares her Covid-19 Story, From the Lasting Effects on her Father, to the Impact on her Children.
Show Notes Transcript

And I truly believe that I already had COVID I never been as sick as I was in February. And Chris Cuomo said it like you have to move you have to stay active and, you know really kind of feed into your body. And I believe the body heals itself as long as you're giving it the fuel to heal itself, which is movement, staying awake, staying active, I swear to God, I never in my entire life has been that sick.

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Unknown 0:00
You are now listening to the project quake project quake project where we stop at nothing to bring you the right backs on health, fitness and psychology, featuring some of the world's most experienced professionals. So you can learn and play with your hosts make dirty. And I truly believe that I already had COVID I never been as sick as I was in February. And Chris Cuomo said it like you have to move you have to stay active and, you know really kind of feed into your body. And I believe the body heals itself as long as you're giving it the fuel to heal itself, which is movement, staying awake, staying active, I swear to God, I never in my entire life has been that sick.

Unknown 0:45
They say I got Corona. Nothing was wrong with me. After doing the swab, I lost the sense of taste and smell for three days only. And they're like, yeah, this is the coronas. And I'm like, no, that very second when I got swamp, it just flew out the window. And the doctor came in. He's like, this is a symptom of Corona. And I told them, well, you say it, but I'm sorry, this is my body. I'm gonna get my taste and smell back. How are you gonna do it? I'm like, I'm gonna go deep and talk to my body and meditate on it and do my hypnosis sessions. And the doctor laughed. But he didn't laugh. On the fourth day, I told him, Hey, I taste I know me more than you know me.

Unknown 1:22
That's been the biggest problem with Corona and COVID. Not per se, the treatment. But also that the idea is, is that this thing just happens suddenly, we don't know a lot about it. And then suddenly, we've got all these patients that are in the hospital, all alone, not having a new one to visit them. They don't have any family members around them. And we're depending on these caretakers, the doctors or the nurses to be able to kind of like, replace our existence.

Unknown 1:46
All this and more in today's episode. Hey, everybody, welcome to this episode of the project. And me and dr. D are joined by a fellow graduate student with me. We both graduated from a UK I think the same year if I'm not mistaken. Did dr. D teach you to or no,

Unknown 2:06
I teach you because I remember.

Unknown 2:09
No, because that's another funny part. I'll come to that story. But yeah, because I see you because yeah,

Unknown 2:17
I said you but you never took a class from me. No, I

Unknown 2:20
honestly don't know what class you teach. I think psychology I might want it to, but I second majored in a UK that was my second major. Oh, okay. So I did a tos my first first major Yeah, I'm a chemical engineer.

Unknown 2:36
Okay.

Unknown 2:37
Wow. I had no clue. I had no clue. Well, everybody, I'm gonna put a name behind the voice right now. Oh, Maya, she Oh, Maya means Mother of Aya in Kuwait or in the Middle East we say father of or mother of to distinguish a parent. And so I Baluchi, thank you so much for joining us on the show. This is basically another COVID Corona episode, so to speak, with a really heartfelt story that I think a lot of people followed on Instagram from you. And I, you really did a great public service announcement and my heart goes out to you and your family and everything that you are dealing with and kin and my thoughts and prayers were with you the entire time when you were in job in hospital separated from your children, and when your dad was in ICU, and I'm going to leave you to talk about that story from A to Z. And hopefully, for a lot of people this will resonate and you know, help spread awareness and the message of being careful nowadays, especially for our parents.

Unknown 3:41
Definitely. Thank you so much for this lovely introduction. And thank you, Maddie and dr. D for having me It's been long do and just to because I'm a bit of OCD, when it comes to many things. And if any of the listeners would find a bit of my conversation confusing as I say in every interview, when I speak it sounds like a freakin Quentin Tarantino movie. So I will get I promise you if I'm diving, right, left up, down. You will get it you will and they're like, okay,

Unknown 4:16
they gotta follow you on Instagram. What's your Instagram handle? Give everybody your Instagram handle. So then they can follow Kuwaiti version of guaranteed Oh

Unknown 4:28
yes. My name is not in the blue sheet. A lot of Westerners easier for them to say estra so like Ezra asstra. And sometimes he says, so it's fine. I'm cool with anything as long as you just call me I'll just answer. My Instagram handle is aka printer entrepreneur turned into Okta, which is half human, half octopus, which I have been since I had my first child. And yeah, they can follow me if they're interested to see any. I have no idea what I'm doing on Instagram, but I'm trying to Do that

Unknown 5:00
I love.

Unknown 5:02
Like the stories. And I like it actually,

Unknown 5:06
I think you I went public this year, I was private because let me just explain my background really quickly. So you're asking me why you have not seen me in university. I second majored in a UK I did marketing, PR management, I minor in Visual Arts and art history. That's a UK American versus quit. My first major was in Kayuu, chemical engineering, I studied, I graduated, I worked and then I realized that that's for another story. Because very interesting over here, what I went through, and I realized I'm not meant to sit in a lab and just mix chemicals together. So I went to UK and they transferred all my sciences. So I that's why I graduated like two years. Okay. And of course, so it was, yeah, and I loved it. And this is why I love it. Because I have amazing connections like Maddie. And now you want everyone's like everyone who has an amazing business. A UK? Yes.

Unknown 6:01
Yeah, that's right. That's right. Yes. Well, that's why I didn't see you because you didn't have to take any science. And we're a social science. So you didn't need

Unknown 6:09
Ah, yes, I did. That's all I wanted to. But No, I didn't. I did a bit of psychology in the States, but none a okay.

Unknown 6:17
Yeah, yes. You seem to be doing well. So I don't think Thank

Unknown 6:20
you. Oh, that's, that's a session that I'm having. That was on another topic. So these are my, let's say, so called echo meditations. I don't believe in certificates anymore. But what I believe is in what I do, and going public this year, which is in March, I decided I'm going to open my account. I handle many clients, and I have brand people so my talent agent, talent manager, so and I do networking dinners. So I turned my Instagram into, like life sessions because everyone was quarantined, and then we went to a lockdown before I went in the hospital, falsely, I still say falsely accused of Corona, because to me, it's a propaganda. And then I will dive deep. Now I was like the defense. Yes. So I did a couple of lines. And it was really fun. And the next day I did them nearly every day, like five times a week. So the day that I was diagnosed with so called Corona was because they say I caught it from my mother. My mother is a nurse director and job at hospital. And she and my father which she obviously shared her bed got sick, and they had a fever like any other excessive fever that you get. And but for us because at the beginning March, it was an April, that was literally on April 24. I looked at my mom, I was like Mama, you're so whites, you are like the wall and you You look like a tomato now from the fever. Like Mama, you look like a tomato you need to go check because we have been social distancing. And now you're sick. And it was one day I took care of her I was just giving them handling in soup, juice and I left and maybe this is where I so called caught it. And I told her mama you have to check because you're not looking good. And my mom was not dealing with COVID patients in the hospital. A job at Hospital in Kuwait is the corona hospital. Sir, for people who don't know yet it is it is the corona hospital. So my mom did the swab on the 24th 25th she got admitted into the hospital and 25th me my dad, my brother and my two kids. All of us want to swap and it was horrible because it was like oh my god. This is exactly like the movie that I saw. I don't know what cheer but I remember what is happening. And this is not real because I was enjoying the quarantine I was enjoying the slow pace as a workaholic, staying at home enjoying reading finishing my workshops because it was joy to me and I took it really nicely and I think I work a lot on my mental states and I do admit when I just feel down or not so this is why I think a lot of people contact me even after the coronas saying how did you do it? I'm like all the courses and books I ever took in the past three four years came in handy apparently I was preparing myself subconsciously for this day. So I believe that truly

Unknown 9:19
sorry just real quick not to cut you

Unknown 9:21
off Tommy just

Unknown 9:21
for the International listeners job at hospital at the beginning of the corona pandemic here in Kuwait. Everyone who tested positive was given a room and was admitted into job at hospital for I believe it was a 30 day quarantine correct US law regardless whether you had serious symptoms or not. You were still quarantine within this hospital. Yes. And that was just at the beginning. Correct?

Unknown 9:44
Yes, I was one of the first people to catch it or from the first people or the first graduates from the hospital to catch it and not 30 days. They make you stay 14 days and from the 14 days. You get swapped three times, and you have to have three negative swamps in order to leave. So I ended up staying a good chunk of a 20 days like a 19th was the last day I slept. And 20th was the last day I left the hospital. And so yeah, it was horrible. And yet, it was an experience, which I would love to explain, because it's my experience. The only truth I can say is what I experienced, right? You're saying by being so you were hospitalized first, and then your parents because you're saying your parents also had a fever? No, my mom was the first one to go. And she went in a day before. So obviously they're like, okay, who do you live with? Who did you mingle with? And she's like, I didn't mingle with anyone. But my daughter lives with me and her kids and my son and my husband. And obviously, that wasn't looking good, because but he was only normally sick. I have to speak the way I speak. I go home, and the Quentin Tarantino style in order for people to understand. So Baba had a fever and was coughing mightily, and a lot of the listeners should know in case they follow me or not, or want more details, my dad has no illness. He's 63 healthy, he goes to work. He has nothing. He's not diabetic, he doesn't smoke, no chest allergies, nothing, nothing, nothing at all, a healthy 63 year old man. But that's where it happened. And that's my own belief and my research and the amount of consultants that I spoke to throughout the time until now, I went to dad freaked out when my mom was admitted in the hospital because, you know, Corona was a big thing. In March, April, it was a Corona Corona everywhere lockdown the world quarantine. Oh my God, we don't know where it is the enemy that we can't see. And so I looked at him and literally his face dropped. You know, when like, what's wrong with you and your mom, a much much an advocate your mom, unless you like, come down. We're gonna swamp We're fine. Oh, my God, we're gonna have something really annoying. Go up our nose, but we'll be fine. And it's just Corona. Dad. It's nothing. Because we were all fine and fed. And then within a week there like coronas coming to Kuwait or it came to quit, then people freaked out. Imagine no one told us there was Corona, I believe life would have been normal and people would be sick. Normally, mental state would be fine. immunity wouldn't have dropped and all of this my own belief, literally. So we all swapped and within less than 24 hours 530 I got a call. Slightly douchey. You and your dad from abuse. You have Corona? It was the kids. That was my concern. The kids, the kids. I know. Just some No. And then this is where it started. I was like, did it? And I was like, Can I have the kids with me in the hospital? Like can't leave them? Our housekeeper travel in January. My brother is a 37 year single man. How can I leave my kids with him and they have to be quarantined with him 14 days before going to my sister who's married, or any of my own, or even their father. And I was like, Oh my God, my fear came to Wow, why did this stuff? Oh, I freaked out. I literally was going to have a panic attack. But then I realized No, that is having a panic attack. Because he did. He had I looked at him. I was like, blah, blah. Me and you have Corona. And then he dropped. Literally he dropped. You know, when someone like gets scared. That's what happened to him. And I was like, colosse What's wrong with you know? Any I can't curse but you know, like, get it together.

Unknown 13:33
Curse if you want again. Yeah, go ahead and get Have at it. Like I was like getting your shit together.

Unknown 13:37
Like that when you're sitting together. And he's like, wait, your mom, you you had on the kids. You know, he freaked out. Yeah. And this is where he freaked out. And funny thing, he doesn't remember this. Now he's like, oh, he doesn't remember this. I literally opened one of my big luggage, my suitcases and just put in everything as if I was traveling. I don't know why I did that. But I'm glad I did my laptop, my books, everything. I was like, okay, I've always wanted to go on a trip a solo trip alone, which I never had, because I have not fear. A bit of anxiety of sleeping alone in a hotel room. I travel alone, but in a hotel. I one of my friends has to be with me for work. I was like, Okay, this is like the let's say some mini trip. I'm gonna stay three, four days. And this is what I need. Justin, my brother was making fun of me two weeks ago. So what so what you have two kids? What is this? You're talking about? elearning and that was elearning. Fresh hot March, April. Were you whining and as I looked at I was like, No, you handle it. And obviously I was dying and says like, now you get to handle them. So be amazing. We'll deal with. Oh, he did. He didn't. He told me he's like, this is so hard. I was like really? Really. So that's also part of the story. And literally two weeks before that, he was like that washed out. He's like Come on What is is not so hard to like raising kids? Look who's talking to single guy? What are you gonna do bla bla bla and then the kids and I took the kids, obviously I was like in tears and then like wiping my tears like, Listen, we're going to video called every day. This is going to be a trip. Imagine you guys are traveling with Uncle Justin, you're traveling with him. We're going to call everyday we're going to do fun things. Okay? We're going to have a space, but I'm here. I'm here because also by third profession, I'm a conscious parent instructor. I give conscious parenting courses. It came in handy. Thank God, I finished the course last.

Unknown 15:36
But that little later, wow, I think I looked at the episode on conscious parents. I swear to God.

Unknown 15:43
Tell me about it. So I look at the kids. And it was so hard I got in my car that came and we drove. And I remember this day vividly, the clouds didn't look good. The weather wasn't good on that day. It was 26th of April. And Baba was like complaining about the weather. I was like that really, really dead. He's like, what is this? What there's ugly and we have Corona. And I was like, Dad, Mom is in the hospital. We're fine. We're fine. We went in and I salute the nurses, not the doctors and I will be very free to talk about it because I'm not dissing them. But I salute the nurses in the hospital big time. They are angels. They are the like the white angels as they call them. I salute them and the staff, the way they dealt with the system is going in and trying the hospital salute to them big time. So we went in and the sad part that's that's the last time I'm going to ever see my dad walk again, by the way, with his bare feet. And this this I remember walking alley to alley because the hospital is huge. It's an amazing hospital. It's huge in the alley through the elevators, and that was like slouching. And I know he's entering his depression mode that freaks out that's the first time he enters the hospital. The first time he's ever going to sleep in the hospital. Obviously he never give birth so it's this first time a swimmin if we're married or not we we've been in and out and for him. I know even men have been in the house but for dad know if any of us was ever enters the hospital, he never visits he visits on the third day when we're fine. He has phobia. I look back I was like Baba, do you need a wheelchair? No, ma'am, she mfine Shay, I'm gonna walk Nothing's wrong with us. And he's like, literally slow motion. I remember this. And it breaks my heart now because I just you made me remember that day, but it's okay. It was it was it and him standing. And they're taking our way. They're taking our pressure before entering our rooms. So mom, because she's the first staff in the hospital to catch it. They give her a suite. And she's like, I want my husband and daughter with me. And I looked I was like, No, I love you both. But I am going through so much right now. I'm not going to stay with you in the room. I can. Three of us. I'm not gonna and at some point I wish I did. So dad went in and I was like four rooms down the line. And this is where the nightmare started. And I've been getting phone calls since it really did you catch it Really? What's happening. You had a live yesterday with your cousin and it was a musical live. And it was the first day of Ramadan. And I was like yeah, you guys me my dad and my mom were in the hospital. No. And then I just started, you know, I did a story and I was like, it was the first time I cried a story. I might look pathetic or I wasn't victimizing myself or anything, but I just I wanted to say like, Okay, everyone is calling. I cannot handle these phone calls. But I'm gonna be posting on social media for everyone to give me an update, or to get to be updated. Sorry. And it started first night. Actually, I cried every day. But the first day was the hardest for me. One I never slept alone. Ever. Like besides like, you know, in Okay, in my room at home, that's different. I know, my parents are outside and I didn't know I had this phobia. I did not know and I had to face it not knowing, literally and I was like wow, God or universe would Why? The year 2020 is very interesting.

Unknown 19:15
And especially you had to stay in your room so your quarantine in your room. It's not like I'm gonna go and walk tomorrow.

Unknown 19:21
No, no, I can't at all. I did not see any face for 20 days. Everyone had a mask on? Wow. I know. It annoyed the daylights out of me. The only people I saw were video calls of my family, my friends. And it wasn't real and even that's when I started drawing smile on the mask. I was like you guys were in the hospital. They say I got Corona. Nothing was wrong with me. After doing the swab, I lost the sense of taste and smell for three days only. And they're like, yeah, this is the coronas and I'm like no, no, you swab me from that. That's swab. The very second one. I got swamped. It just flew out the window. And the doctor came in. He's like, this is a symptom of Corona. And I told them, well, you say it, but I'm sorry, this is my body. I'm gonna get my taste and smell back. How are you gonna do it? I'm like, I'm gonna talk to my body. I'm gonna go deep and talk to my body and meditate on it and do my hypnosis sessions. And the doctor laughed. But he didn't laugh when the fourth day I told him Hey, I taste a bit. So don't tell me what's wrong with me. Because this is I know what's wrong with me. You don't know what's wrong. I know me more than you know me. It might sound a little maybe spiritual or philosophical. What I'm saying, but this is my truth. And again, the only truth I know is what I went through. So, four days in the hospital first day, second day, it was it was going okay, speaking to everyone, literally everyone in Kuwait and the world and people I don't remember calling me. It was lovely to support. I loved it. I thank everyone, if not, on a daily basis on a continuous basis. The calls the messages, flowers been sent food been giving and everything even even I met people after the hospital because they send me food. They're like we sympathize with you. And thank you for giving us updates on what's happening every day. So Oh, you want connection? There's a cut off. But you want show? There's a show on Monday. Who sent it? I don't know. Oh, someone from Instagram. Thank you. I love food. It doesn't show but I love food so much.

Unknown 21:24
Oh, wow,

Unknown 21:25
this is so nice. It was beautiful. And that was when I knew. You know, thank god there are so humans, there's still humanity out there. And people you know, when you don't know it was beautiful. And even my cousin's as much as they annoyed me from phone calls from 8am to 1am. Because there was an Amazon. They had nothing to do except let's check on Assad. Hello. Hi, honey. Oh, hold on. Your brother called and your other brother called and everyone from your family code. So this section of the cousins can one just called me and then update the rest. It's getting annoying. It got really overwhelming because because your data King, of course, I was panicking. And I had to repeat my story a million times and mum and dad were in the other room with a fever. their phones were off. So I had to deal with my friends, my cousins, their friends, their cousins, my kids. It was so much my uncle's my aunt my grandmother. It was too much and I was the director. I was the phone directory. Hello. At the point I was like hello. snarling douchey jabber hospital. Yes, middle area. They're fine. I'm okay. Do you want to ask about me? I'm a somatic. So they say but I'm okay. So

Unknown 22:36
you didn't even have a tickle in your throat? a cough? A sniffle nothing like zero.

Unknown 22:41
No, no, absolutely nothing to things. So they say you know when you feel tired a day before they did the swap like the day my mom entered I just had I think even it was mental. It was a panic. My body just went into panic mode. You know that fever? That wasn't even a few fever that you just get up and go to work. Yeah, you know, that kind of fever that you know, when your body's like, you just need to sleep. That's the only thing I felt aching. I didn't have any headache. Nothing and the taste of smelled that went away. I know it's from the swamp because that doctor pinched it way deep inside and turn it around. It hit a nerve. Because I was tasting fine on that day. And at night. It just went away. Right. That's my analysis.

Unknown 23:24
And we need to clarify also because back then, in April, everyone that was getting tested or everyone that had someone in their family that had COVID they were all had to be excluded from the house from the community wherever. So yes, I'm send everyone to jabber so that way you could connect from your kids or your brother or whoever. And so it is does isolate you plus they don't really know. I mean you're asymptomatic didn't have any symptoms, but because you tested positive instead of saying just stay home quarantine you

Unknown 23:55
wish they did.

Unknown 23:56
They didn't know at the time, right?

Unknown 23:59
Yes, I wish they did. But I don't blame them. Also, I'm not here to blame anyone, even the doctors but I I wish that they went with their intuition and their gut feeling more than the medical books. And at that time, sometimes you need to you know, you need that gut feeling. So, on the fourth day it started I was doing yoga and I just posted like Yeah, I did yoga in the morning. Okay, I'm starting to exercise. I'm starting to eat and my friends were like, yeah, put some makeup on. I was like for who? I can't even open the window that annoys me. I can't even open the window. I want fresh air. I'm a very nature kind of person and I used to call my parents drunk. And like hi Mama. And my mom's like hey, happy tired What's wrong? Does not feeling good. What Why? I don't know he has a he's still not eating. Tell him I swear to God, I'm gonna leave my room. I'll leave the room. I'll hit all the nurses and doctors and come and like tell him Baba has some soup. And she's like, Yeah, but they say his oxygen is dropping. And here I I freaked literally this was the sound in my head.

Unknown 25:01
What's going on? And I was like mama video call, Mama video call. I want to talk to him video call and I video called and he had the oxygen mask on. Baba What's wrong? And he's like Murphy and then I started crying. I was like Baba, they say they're taking you down to the ICU. Why? Why? Baba, breathe, breathe. Do the five breaths in your nose. Eight breaths out of your mouth. Come on, Bob. Breathe, breathe. Talk to your body. Baba. I literally my mom's like, Nah, he's not. He's gonna get it. Baba. you own your body. Okay, you own it. You're healthy. Nothing's wrong with you. Fuck them. They say you have crony have nothing. This is just paperwork. They just want to get more people down the line to vaccinate us. mafex shamerrific mafex shame is like you have nothing Baba. And just a colossal Baba, don't cry, don't cry. So that was the last thing he told me. And then after I heard his voice again four months ago, and then they take him down. And this is where the nightmares started. I laugh I'm sarcastically laughing honestly. And then the doctors and when they took him down, I started calling my friends who work at the hospital like dad went down. I need to know what ICU he went down in. And it's been two hours no one and I'm hearing they're gonna induce him. They're gonna put them on a ventilation. Why? Did they try talking to him? And I'm sorry, if he's dropping? Is it cold blue? I need this information. And I'm sorry, no one has any filing job at hospital Did you ask us? What kind of illness or sickness or any pills or medicine My dad is on? They just took him away like that? Because when we entered all the questions that was asked, I was there. And I asked my mom did they ask Mom, Mom, wake up? Hello, mom. I know you have a fever. But Hello, wake up. Call your nursing staff call everyone that's under you tell them my husband has been shifted down. And she's like, Okay, Okay, I will. And the doctor calls me He's like, okay, so your dad stopped breathing. Which by the way was not true because I looked at his files. Okay, he stopped breathing. What did you do? So you did a what? Is it? Like a code blue? No. Are you a doctor? This is where it start? I'm like, No, honey, I'm not a doctor. I'm educated. Okay, let's continue. So what's going on? Okay, so we put them on a ventilation he stable now every 16 hours, you're going to shift him from his stomach to his back to keep the oxygen level in place. And I was like, okay, Doctor, do you know that my dad has no illness? This is the first time he catches anything ever. It doesn't make any sense what's going on? Because a lot of people so I've read so I've read. So I've asked that are in the ICU already have diabetes, sickness, cancer, something that has nothing unless he has something and we don't know? And no, no, no, his oxygen really dropped. So we're taking him from ICU green to purple. Purple is the worst. And I started like this. I was like, people can't see me. But can you imagine like a skinny girl shaking that was like, Oh my god, how am I gonna get some love because they everyone's calling me. And then again, their whole family starts calling and I have a huge family. Huge. Everyone. Like if my cousin calls her daughter has to call and I'm like, I love you guys. But stop. You're killing me. I could not be mean, because I'm not a selfish kind. Sometimes I wish I was I can because I understand the empathy that's coming from them. And it was needed at that time. But it was just a roller coaster. And it started every day, I have to wait for one phone call to see how my dad is doing. And every day I had a different scenario. Yeah, has oxygen dropped. He's fine. stable, can stop. And it went on for 20 days since. And within the 20 days that I was in the hospital and talking to different doctors every week, a doctor shifts and I asked questions, and I asked to get reports and they don't. And then I go to my mom's friends, which are the nurses. I'm like, please send me my dad's reports. But you don't know what chemicals they would give them. I'm like, yeah, honey, I never used properly My Chemical Engineering degree. But this is where it came to place. FYI, this year on all the things I studied, which dealt with chemistry and chemicals and stuff, because we do take courses and classes, you know, like organic chemistry 1234 or five or what I forgot, but it was many something to do it even pharmaceutical stuff, and I get it. And I look at the medicines and I'm like, why are they mixing so much? This is so much so much medicine being put into a man's body that has nothing to do with that. Why? And the funny thing is, which I do not salute them for and I despise them for for the lack of intelligence, I might say when they told me the first day we're going to give him Trump's injection. And I remember I was on the phone. I was like what? What is Trump's injection? What is this? What is this bullshit you're talking about? They're like, you know, the hydrochloric when they didn't even say it right. I was like, Oh, the hydrochloric when so you're calling it Trump. can I say? Yes, I have to Yeah, go ahead. Yeah, and then Americans like any color so Kelly Kelly might kill us but delete the metaphors. Trump's injection. That's so reassuring. I was telling you like

Unknown 30:04
all the medical, which was very much criticized, by the way, and a lot of lawyers said it was not suitable for a lot of the COVID patients. And so

Unknown 30:13
of course, and I told the doctors, I was like, Did you see what happened to Italy? Were you here? You don't know how much stressed we are. I was like, I'm sorry. I sympathize with you guys. But I don't care. You took an oath. This is your job. It's your time. If someone like me comes asking questions, and it bothers you that I'm asking, and I know what I'm talking about. And it pisses you off, that you you decide not to talk to me. It's not my problem. It's yours. I have all the rights to know my dad's case on a daily basis, if not every 12 hours.

Unknown 30:49
They did give them the hydrocodone

Unknown 30:52
Yes, they gave him for six days, which is okay, for six days. What was

Unknown 30:57
the effect of it

Unknown 30:59
effect? It caused a collapse in his lungs and excessive blood clots, which they said from the corona and I told them no, even if, even if his oxygen level dropped, because anyone who, who let's say is maybe can't breathe enough oxygen, he feels sick, it's normal. But you cause excessive damage to a person who's my dad never smoked. Never. He hates cigarettes. Maybe I smoke, he doesn't smoke. I'm a social smoker. He doesn't smoke. He's like, Oh, my God, you guys.

Unknown 31:29
What are you doing to your lungs?

Unknown 31:31
And we joke about it now, obviously, we like that. Yeah. Don't you wish you had a cigarette? One or two in your life, you know?

Unknown 31:38
And here is that here, this person who took care of himself didn't have any, any medical issues, and it seems like he was affected the most. He was you're saying that maybe there was a misdiagnosis? That's what you're saying.

Unknown 31:52
There was for me as his daughter, and I think I have all the right to say there was an excessive misdiagnosis because I have an uncle who is from the Emirates and my dad's brother. He lived there. So he he's married to an Emirati. Hello, Susan Emirati. No. And I say this to everyone. And I asked and I told them, me, john, Uncle George, can I say so just happy to say whatever you want. He's the size of the globe. He has asthma. He's literally he's like a very fat person. And I'm not making fun of him. But I'm just saying the sentence. He has asthma, he's diabetic. And he caught Corona and the procedure that they dealt with him there and he caught it after that. He's like, I felt like you know, some pressure on my chest. I felt like I couldn't breathe good. But the doctors came in, and they were speaking to me everyday jawans, you can do with it. Breathe slowly. There's nothing wrong with you, you're fine. And he came out of it after two weeks. And he's like, What is wrong with him? And what's wrong with my brother? Why is he still in the ICU? And we're kind of like, I don't know. I don't know. I mean, Joe, I don't know what they're doing. I'm sorry. I have no idea. And I would respect any doctor that came to me and told me you know what, we don't know what we're doing. But we're gonna try. I would respect that. But they didn't. They're like, we gave him that injection. And I told them, okay, I don't care of who authorized it, which they didn't, you cannot go by a tweet. Because they went by a tweet. Wow, education. That's what I did to them. And I'm sorry, this is gonna turn into a sarcastic This is the sarcastic phase. Like, hey, select your medical education and degree there. I'm clapping. And I told them. Okay, did you ask any of the family members that if it's okay, we're going to give to your debt because maybe we don't want you to give it to him? Maybe you know, we'd rather he just maybe passes away naturally without this expecting because this affected a lot of things what he's going through now. So and the process goes on, and I was obviously I they hated me. I was banned even from the hospital. I'll come to that.

Unknown 33:49
I

Unknown 33:50
yeah, I was, but I got what was on my side. Oh, yes. Yes. And I am doing alive when my dad is finish and well, and when he he says, Okay, I'm ready. I'm gonna do a live and talk about all of this. And I don't care. Honestly, what are they gonna do?

Unknown 34:05
I remember not to cut you off. Remember when you were trying to fight to get into the ICU? I remember you posting that and you were like, these sons of bitches. Let me into the ICU and this was deep into like, month two or like a month into it?

Unknown 34:21
Yes. Like hey, as in June,

Unknown 34:23
yeah. Hey, it was me. And hey, we're looking at I'm like, oh my god. Like, I throw haymakers like you know what I mean? Like I was just, I would literally tear someone's head off. If either of my parents were in there. And, you know, it's I can't fathom the thought of people stopping someone from seeing a loved one that is in critical condition. To me, it's like four months, right? Yeah.

Unknown 34:47
But no, they couldn't ban us. That's the funny part. I want to get to this point. I do understand it's a pandemic. People don't understand it. Everyone is scared. They have loved ones in ICU. They want to minimize hospitals, traffic. foot traffic, I do understand it. But when one person wants to visit behind the window, and this one person wants to ask about the loved one, do give me a feedback do not make me wait 20 days because that's what they did during this process that was oxygen going up, down, stabilizing Up, down, and then we got into his kidney. And I called the doctor, I was like, No, that is fine. He might need No, he's not getting dialysis. My dad, he doesn't have kidney problems, he tends to have kidney stones, and we just give him a few like non alcoholic beers. He's fine. He drinks a lot of butter, because it goes through you think it's not a kidney problem. You guys have been inducing him with excessive amount of medicine. He's induced, he's asleep. He's getting so much medicine, he's not moving. He's not aware. So he can fight it himself, you know? So what do you expect? Of course, his body's gonna act weird. And they're like, No, I don't know what you're saying. I'm like, it's okay. You're never gonna know what I'm saying. But can I and this is every doctor I talked to, I just dive in and tell them the sinners, like, are you Dr. strat, I'm like, No, no, I'm not a doctor. But if you I can be a doctor, if you want, I'll print my medical degree right now. I'll print it off the internet. But is it gonna make you listen to me more? And they're like, no, but maybe No, no, I'm a chemical engineer. I never used it. It's been like 12 years. But Hello, you're talking to an engineer, if that's gonna like fluff things up. And he didn't he didn't need dialysis. Because I was striving for that. And this is where my research started on the internet, talking to doctors, Australia, UK, Canada. And everyone was telling us, yeah, we know things are going weird. But for your dad's case, to have no disease, or not whatsoever to have caught COVID in the sense. There was a question mark, and why did they induce him? What was the oxygen level when it dropped? 7070 he shouldn't be put on a ventilation machine. They could have waited. Okay. Why is he still induced. So 18 days, because the 20 day that I left he was 18. Yeah, I kept count. On the 18th day I left. On the 20 day I left my 20th day, it was 18 day of that in the ICU, I went behind the way told the doctor, I'm not going to leave until I see my dad because no one saw him. And that's the first time with COVID you can't see anyone. It's It's horrible. You know, when you're sick. This is why people visit even for like five minutes. It just lifts your spirit up. The human interaction that you get is nothing compared to the virtual world. I am blessed to live in, let's say in a time of Corona with virtual with the internet. And with whatever we're having in the social media era. I'm blessed. Imagine that we have no phones and put on is there. I don't know how that would be. But I think we'll manage. We're humans. We're adaptable. We're creatures like that. So I went I send the doctors like, how are you going to see your dad? And I looked at him. I was like, I need to talk to the head of the ICU. Why do you want to seem like because I want to see my father. I'm sure that behind the window. I can see him I just want to see him. And they laughed. And I looked at that. I was like, Why are you laughing? while laughing? Is this funny? Is this funny? If I want to see my dad before he dies, because every day since he's been in the ICU kept telling me prepare yourself. That's how you kept me a patient in the hospital full of hope. This is what you're telling me. And then you call me telling me his limbs are turning blue. And I asked you are you massaging it? Did you check? Did you call blood vascular surgeons? Did you get anyone to do a CT scan? Hello, wake up and smell the roses. There's no roses, there's hot air in Kuwait. But what are you doing? And like,

Unknown 38:32
I think also one of the struggles are a lot of people and we've had people on this show. So we're, that's been the biggest problem with I think with Corona and COVID. Not per se, the treatment. But also that the idea is is that this thing just happens suddenly, we don't know a lot about it. And then suddenly, we've got all these patients that are in the hospital, all alone, not having anyone to visit them, they don't have any family members around them. And we're depending on these caretakers to be able the doctors or the nurses to be able to kind of like, replace our existence. And actually, we even had one person here who her brother died. And it's like, you know, they don't know how when he went in, they don't know when nothing and they get a phone call. Well, he's dead, you know, come. This is the most terrible. And I actually I just have a couple of other friends there. One there, her mom died in a nursing home again. But you can see them you don't know what's happening with treatment to other people the same way so I could see how scary it is that you're insisting I want to see him and there following a protocol when you know that your dad is all alone, and he probably would have felt more safe. And maybe you maybe you would have gotten better because we know there's a lot of research that says, you know, having that social support and hospitals with especially for elderly like, you know, if you have somebody sitting them being with them, it was sedated, but but I also could see that we had so much lack of knowledge about what this thing is that they were becoming more too cautious and You know, overly on the other side, you know, neglected a lot of that human contact.

Unknown 40:06
And they did. I did so yesterday. It is because I get again, I'm not here to blame. But if I'm, if I never went into medical school I never studied. I'm a reader, I might be fluent in English and a bit of Arabic. But that didn't stop me from doing research to know how I can help my dad. And you know what the doctors even they told my mom, they're like, we kind of got scared of your daughter. Every time I went to I was like, I know you guys hate me. But I don't care. That's my dad,

Unknown 40:35
I have a quick question about the doctors. And this is where I saw different opinions. Were they young or old? How old? Were they? Yes, because the young doctors that I've had on the show that I've talked to said, we have no clue. They're like, Look, any doctor that says they know what they're doing. They're lying to you. Because no one has any clue how this is transmitted. There's no data. There's no research at this point. Even when Dr. Shah came on the show, he was like, Look, you know, this is a brand new thing. Like we don't know, was it created by humans? Was it transferred from animals? No one knows. And it's too soon to understand anything about it. And I applaud those young doctors because they came out and they said, legitimately, yes, they're like, Look, you know, my cousin's a doctor. And he said, when this started, he's like, oh, we're gonna have easy 200,000 cases, maybe 150,000 cases, like, I'm with no way. And now I'm looking at the cases we haven't quite I'm like, holy shit. He was right. And he said, we don't know what this is, no one knows how to treat it. And I think we can kind of agree that some patients were probably used as guinea pigs to figure things out and see what methods could work. Yeah. Now, let's fast forward a little bit to an uplifting moment. How were your feelings when you got the call that your dad was awake?

Unknown 41:56
Oh, we're gonna go there. There's a lot to talk about. Maybe you just gonna like surf it off.

Unknown 42:00
Yeah, but we got we got to fast forward a little bit at a time. I mean, but I want to get to that point.

Unknown 42:06
Yes, yes. Because we're talking about intense daily emotions.

Unknown 42:10
Yeah. And then there was a lot that went in from and I believe this is probably going to be a three part episode. There was a lot that went in after your dad was released with what happened afterwards. Yes. You know, the follow through after that, because I saw a video you posted and I was in tears. I'm a 37 year old man, and I was crying like a baby. You know, just hearing about it. Now. It's choking me up. Yes, that video you posted was so emotional. And you know, it took a lot of courage out of you guys

Unknown 42:39
and needed to be posted, honestly. And yeah, it needed honestly, again, I'm gonna fast forward, I am not here to diss anyone. I'm not here to disregard anyone's education. But I just want to ask anyone who's in any fields. Books can teach us only this much. But the way our gut feeling the oath that they've taken to actually I know, they're trying to save lives. But that's my experience. That's why I'm saying I'm telling you what I'm speaking is from my side, there were older doctors there were younger. There was one of the doctors that was like, you know, I'm very tired. When he looked at me, I was like, I really don't care. I really don't care if you're tired. But when you come telling me this thing, and I told him, You know what, I had to go into the hospital sit on the floor. And I did I Instagram this, I was like, I'm gonna wait for this doctor that hasn't called us for 20 days. And we we got updates of my dad from nurses because my mom worked there. And they're doing it for the sake of my mom, and they wanted the name of the nurses. And I'm like, I'm not gonna give it to you. I just want an update on my dad. I want to feel at peace. If anything happens to him that I tried my best. And it's not anyone's fault. That's all I want. And he's like, fine. Do you want to go in and see him? We got a call from the wizard. I was like, Yes, I want to go and see him. Because you banned me for a week every time he was like, No, no, she kept.

Unknown 44:02
I was like, Why can I go in? What's wrong? No, we can't let you in. Why? Because I want to see my dad behind the window. Yeah, because you're making so much noise. Because this is what I used to do. Monday. I used to go in and knock on the windows. They're like he can't hear I was like you say he can't but I say he can. Yeah, so can I just do what I want to do? Let me let me be delusional. Let me be crazy. Let me be the Alice in Wonderland that I am. Let me be whatever I want to be so I can feel okay. You know, sometimes it's the way you deal with it. They don't want you to do that. And I again, they were trying to balance it between, can we let people in? And I told them, Hey, I got cut on a so called and I don't care. I'm not gonna catch it again. And if I did, I really don't care because nothing's gonna happen to me. This is how I see it. And the funny thing is with the males, it was mostly males in the ICU. So that's another thing so dad went through a lot of ups and downs, three heart attacks. While he was there, his heart stopped three times a hemorrhage and you know, like Brain stroke this and that it was it was a roller coaster It was. It was such a hard year that I was like, oh god, what is it? What are you testing us with? What is going on? Why is this happening to this man? that literally my dad is like, so sad. He's like a movie my sits and watches all the movies in the world. And that's it goes to where it comes back. Alice finished the day. So, um, I really believed he was going to wake up. I really really believe and my, my mom and my brother and my aunts, you know, they were there was a point where they were like, I heard them talking about, you know, a funeral and looked, I was like, what, what the fuck is going on? And they're like, saw you've been very you're not detaching some things. I was like, Well, I have faith in me. I feel it. I have faith. I feel it. He's gonna be fine. I don't feel he's gonna leave like this. I don't feel my dad's leaving. And I told him I know you think again, I'm going crazy. Maybe I am. But he's not leaving. So this is the fun part. When one of the people that I met through Instagram, told me there's this professor. He's a researcher, he does reflexology. He does nerve reflexology intensely. And he's posting about how to do certain exercises and pressure points on the body to boost the oxygen and the immunity to Hello. And I'll say his name Dr. Assad. Hello, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, I need to see you because I need to see you. If you know what is wrong with me before I take any of your techniques and do it on my dad, or the nurses would do it or the physiotherapists that went and so he held my hand and he just did here a few pressure points as Oh, it's like, okay, you have a column problem. Your back your spine isn't where isn't right, not because you were born this way. I think you're sleeping rolling. And this and this, you're fine. You're just stressed. And I was like, How did you know? He's like, Yeah, I just pressed on a couple of pressure points. And I realized, and I was like, Okay, what should I do to my dad. So he taught me the exercises, which I taught my mom, which when she went back to work after Corona, my mom got better and what she said 28 days of the hospital, she left and when two weeks so home quarantine and then I left all went back to the hospital working. I know it was so hard on her because she had to visit my dad every day and we kept calling mama do this mom open the video called let's see him. What is this? What's happening? She's like, they won't allow me. What are you putting me in this position? And they also banned my mom from seeing her husband. And that was the funny part. That's when I called also the the to the hospital managers like are you banning my mom who has been 36 years in the field who was a nurse surgeon was a sorry, a surgical nurse and a nurse doctor and hospice to see her own husband who got caught Corona from her. It was so funny. I

Unknown 47:42
think I don't blame them that everyone is going crazy. It was like Willy Wonka factory goes with it sounds like they never really have been used to a person like you who really caring things and who Yeah, yes, of course caring but caring because you're questioning and you're very intelligent. And you're like wondering what they're probably used to people that come in and and you know how it is we go in there. I mean, I tell my patients all the time you should ask for my certificate is what do I do? And it's so interesting how people go in two places, psychologists, doctors, they don't know any background on them. They don't know what to ask. So most of the time, especially during Khurana No one asked anything because they assume the doctors really know and they do. I don't want a minimum dismissing on Donnelly. I've worked very hard.

Unknown 48:29
I have I have friends even hours. Yes, of course. And I received

Unknown 48:33
over the long hours. They weren't working long hours. Because this, we weren't prepared. Something just happened. So but for you as a family member, you also shouldn't been stopped for asking questions or trying to find the best help. You can can you can because we we've been your dad,

Unknown 48:50
we've been we've been with my mom's Germany said. When did I say? I said so many things.

Unknown 48:55
Your intuition? No. But there was one thing that I really want people to really hear it is the idea that I know how my body works. I know how I feel. I know If dad is ready to go or not. I think a lot of times, especially being a psychologist, I tried to teach people to really listen to them their body, instead of asking me Should I do this or not? What do you exactly is your gut feeling? We don't really listen to our gut. We don't listen to ourselves. We think we do. Other people know more than us.

Unknown 49:26
Yes, actually, we want what other people say to get that validation that we're okay because we're like everyone else. It's okay not to be like everyone. I was not marked, but I was like, you know, my family was like, okay, she's going through trauma. They question mark me. And then my mom came to my shows and she told me Is he gonna live? My mom like she will because she felt you know, it's her fault. This happened and she was being precautious and I was like, What am I he will and even while he was at the hospital because his hands turned blue. They wanted to amputate. And this is what I told them. I was like Okay, listen you because to me, okay, again my experience. They were not they just left the bedside manners. They were not I knew their doctors. I know they're dealing with a lot, but they were just Hello. Yeah, you know, he might need amputation. I was like, What are you going to amputate? What are you going to cut off from my dad's body that he's not aware of? I was like, Listen, if he does need amputation, and he's gonna have to be awakened out of his induced coma, because he's not in a coma. And he makes his choice. This is his body. This is not my choice that I stood by. I was like, nope. And my brother's like, are you? Oh, I was like, No, no, you're crazy. I'm crazy. We're all crazy. Everyone's crazy. It's okay. But this is, this is a decision, he has to have it. And on. Towards the end of July, they started inducing the sedation. And that was all waking up. My family allowed me to visit him once a week. So I went to Fridays, and that it was one hour one to two, like, behind the window. Because they're like, every time you go, you harass the doctor's last mom's like, class, you're embarrassing me, I went back to work. Like, I don't care. I don't care. They can't fire you. They need you. They can't fire you. So when that started waking up, and so he looks, I used to knock on the windows and jump up and down like, hey, you're okay. You are Oh, can I do thumbs up and I started dancing. And he looks at me and then goes back to sleep. And it was like this for three weeks. Now, he remembers this, which I love because my buddy's like, you know, you acting stupid. I was like, Yeah, okay, I'm stupid. So I don't care and jump up and down. And other people come because it was like a hallway and behind the windows and the numbers of each person, the ICU and people are crying, people are eating called on or whatever. They're doing their own thing. And they're like, I remember there was that week when he was about a week, two weeks before he left the hospital. Who's this what's happening and some woman and a guy and was like, that's my dad. I'm just cheering for him. I'm just trying to cheer him up. Because he's in the ICU. I think the only sound he's hearing is the the 24 hours. And it's, it's scary. Honestly, it's annoying. I had the iPad in and I was like, let him listen to well sounds some sound healing music, some frequency, the beta waves. And they did they didn't I don't know. And there's there's no greenery for him to see. And he kept getting the ICU infection in and out in and out. And the people started cheering. So every time like, oh, how can we say hi to that? Like, yeah, cuz they heard about that guy. And he looked at me and then this was his communication with the zebras and start moving his eyebrows. So I know because my dad does this. He, you know, he has his eyebrows saying, Okay, I'm fine. And I was like, Are you good? Okay, it goes back to bed. And the day that he left the ICU It was super mom was near him. They took him up to the room, and a video called dad. Oh, Baba, how are you feeling? Good. Are you good? Oh my God, You scared us? What the hell did you do to us? Why? Why? Why did you do this? What journey are you on? Didn't you realize that we needed to be started making fun of it. And we're laughing like put some TV on mom is gonna bring food to you everyday from home. And so every day I we spoke to him through video call. And then mom's like, there. He's leaving the hospitals like really? He's leaving the hospital. He's like, Yeah, because there's a lot of infection and they're scared. He's gonna start catching different infections. And yeah, he's coming back home. I was like, Yeah, but he can't move. And so now the whole house had to be ready for a bedridden patient. And it was weird because dad went in walking. That's coming back. not moving walking. And that's so but that was the last time Yes, yeah, it is.

Unknown 53:35
How is he doing this? I was you know,

Unknown 53:38
he's telling me I was just

Unknown 53:41
gonna say before we jump into that, let's talk about the video you posted with your dad not too long ago that I think choked a lot of people up and really I mean, for me, that was the biggest message of and I'm always like, whether this is propaganda whether it was a human that created the virus whether it is a virus, it isn't a virus, any of the above to me personally, I don't want to take the risk all

Unknown 54:07
these conspiracy theories, all the conspiracy

Unknown 54:08
theories always after seeing that video. I was like, I do not want to take that risk. It's not even worth it. It's not worth getting a sniffle right now. Right? You know, especially like for my mother who's 65 or my brother who has Down syndrome was a compromised immune system, or myself. I truly believe that I already had COVID in February, I'd never been as sick as I was in February and I was DJ almost died. I mean, and Chris Cuomo said it like you have to move you have to stay active and you know really kind of feed into your body and I believe it's true. The body heals itself as long as you're giving it the fuel to heal itself, which is movement, staying awake, staying active exam, I was going to work I was keeping my distance I was sick. I told everyone I had a really bad flu and I swear to God, I'd never in my entire life had been that Sick and DJ pay, I thought he was gonna die. She called me She's like, I'm rushing him back to the hospital. He can't breathe. Oh, and I was like, I flew back from you know, work and it was scary as hell because he just had this cough that would not go away. So I'm convinced we had it. So I don't want to get it again. And I don't want to see anyone I know or close to me get it. And after seeing that video that you had posted, it really solidified, it was that wake up call. Everyone kind of got laughs Yeah. And everyone is very relaxed right now.

Unknown 55:31
Yeah, exactly. Everyone's relaxed right now.

Unknown 55:34
We still have to be cautious. Yeah. Monterey Bay. Lake you just make in English. Yes. You don't want to go in as a guinea pig to a hospital and have someone giving you hydrochloric land or whatever the hell they're selling right now. You don't want that? Yeah. So talk about that video you had posted, of course, how your dad wanted you to post that video. And yeah, go ahead.

Unknown 55:57
I have a different story with the video that I posted. I posted it because that was the first time I took my dad out to the beach and on the wheelchairs like Baba, let's get some sensor shine. So every Saturday we're going to go out. So every Saturday, it never happened. We went twice. He's lazy now. So I took him to the beach and we open up his wounds. And I was like, I want to let fresh air because oxygen did not reach his limbs. So what happens it was blood clots all over and it was all the way up his legs and hands by the way, it could have been prevented because the blood clots now we know from other doctors and consultants that it was not from COVID Actually, it was from the excessive medicine that they gave him that mixed up all his hormones in his body. And again, they were trying to save his life. I'd like to believe that but but but but I really wish she was this is something I kept wishing I wish I never took him to the hospital. I wish I had an epiphany that day. I was like you know that Fuck everyone. We're not going to the hospital. We're gonna stay home and deal with this. I really wish I did that because when you're awake and aware, you can move he could have moved his hands move his body kept, you know, did all of this because no one wanted to go into any ICU patients because they're scared. Even when the nurses go in the doctors rarely do behind the window. Unless needed. I saw this. I know this. I can speak of it. No one's gonna move his hands. They're not. So that video that I posted and he's like, I want to thank everyone. I was like, okay, and he's and then we did one video and he's like, yeah, I want to show them my hands and like, why Baba Why? It's not Halloween. We're not going to traumatize people. My dad is a comic by the way. Look, no, I want them to see what happened to me. So they can know that they need to take care and that just I don't know, he's like, I don't know I'd want I was like, Okay, I'm gonna do the video and I'm gonna first download or like I mean yeah, upload the thinking part. You thanking people for the prayers and for all everything amazing because it was a collective prayers for my dad and I believed it was unified and beautiful. I literally thank everyone is still still I have so people praying for him. I love it just shows we're just one consciousness, which is beautiful. I had to post after that video. Okay, guys, if you can't see it, I'm gonna show my dad's hands and legs, maybe not for the faint of hearts. So don't go through it. And we did. So he could move his limbs, but the skin is dead. So the skin is dead oxygen and go and it's just you know, like that skin just doesn't smell good. It's not good at all. And he had a surgery this week will be a month ago, three weeks ago, nearly a month entering a month. He had his right hand amputated and his left fingers which I also fought so hard not for him to go through with and I didn't believe he needed especially his left hand because he was moving his fingers. And I looked at the doctor I was like Why? Why? He was moving his fingers to motherfucker. Why? He's like no, because I was like because what you wanted the easy route out. This was Maddie. The worst feeling I had in my life. I couldn't the whole house were pretty much traumatized with this. We're fine now but two weeks ago, it was too much to handle it was paying I never felt before it's not paying that someone beloved died. It was my dad who's a mechanical engineer fixes everything in the house and my son says he's like album Hemet is a fixer. He's a fixer upper. This is a fixer upper. And who's an artist? No one knows what what happened. Why didn't Why didn't you remove the skin and why didn't we use alternatives and mom and I was so Mama. We could have taken it to Thailand. Turkey. We did some laser to what is going on with you crazy people. I called everyone crazy that day. I went crazy. Like Bob, are you serious? No. And the night and even at the hospital. I was like Dad, are you gonna do this? He's like, Yes, I want to Baba it's my choice. It's my choice. I want to I'm sick and tired of looking at my My hands and I accepted. I had them for 63 years, I'm ready to have bionic hands. And I was like, You know what? I salute you. You're too strong. I love you for this. And this is the first time in my life I realized my dad is so strong. And this is where I take my strength from. And he's Elian. I call him Aslan, Aslan. And Turkish means lion. And I love him so much. And I didn't realize I loved him this much. And I told him, Baba, Tara, I didn't think I love you this much. You had to go through all of this, just so we know. We appreciate you so much. You know what you're under appreciated. By now. Things are gonna change. So he's like, and my dad is a pessimist. He's funny. He's a comedian. He's, you know, he cracks jokes here and there. But he's always been a pessimist. You know, that's what he thinks of, I think at his age. No, he's fully opposite. He's positive. He's like, I'm alive. I'm going to walk again. For me. I'm getting a lot while I was like, I'm gonna walk again. I'm going to get Okay, this is this is gone. Obviously, I had I told him that, you know, you need therapy. Honey, this isn't something normal that you're going through, you need to realize you're not going to be able to use them again. But hey, we're gonna get you bionic cans and stuff. And you're going to be like, there's new technology. And he's like, yeah, I want to be Iron Man. I was like, Yes, you are, you're going to be fucking Iron Man have quit. And I promise you're going to do that. After the surgery. I didn't talk about this much yet. just did a few posts and a couple of magazines called me. They're like, we want to take a picture of it. I was like, No, you're not my dad's getting his bionic hands. Wait until 2021. And then you're going to take a picture of him. You're not going to take a picture of him like this. And then provisions like, you know, we want to do a race under your dad's name was like, okay, not yet. He's gonna walk. He's gonna walk because I promised the doctor because the doctor said this, and I have to do this, I have to because I told him, I told the doctor, you know, there is you. And then there's the higher force, the higher being, because you said my dad won't live and my dad lived. And then you said my dad, if he lives, he's going to live on machines. And he left without machines. And you said if he left, he's going to have delirium. He's going to be delusional, and his brain won't be right. My dad is fully functioning. He even shuts on my kids. And it's funny, and he was telling me somebody had told me come and spec you in my son's like, how you have no hands and everyone was laughing. I was like, Bob, I'm so so he's like, No, he's like, yeah, I have no hands. But you'll, you'll see my iron hands very soon, I'm gonna punch in the face.

Unknown 1:02:26
And just seeing him dealing with this, I realized that I shouldn't stress I should be positive for my dad, I should lift myself up for this man. I know what he went through. And also what

Unknown 1:02:37
your kids are really learning from him. And, and the example that he's setting with all this misfortune? How?

Unknown 1:02:45
Yeah, he's been he's been very positive. This. That is like, they love him so much. Yes.

Unknown 1:02:51
I think yes, I think they're very, they're, you know what they're learning. They're learning resiliency, which is something I study. Yes. And I research and I write about it, because I feel like we do undermine this psychological immune system. And really this test as to how your dad had resilience in he has the psychological immune system. And if it wasn't for that, he wouldn't be optimistic now when he was when he had all parts of his body was pessimists. Exactly. Look at this. Yes.

Unknown 1:03:21
Yeah, this doesn't make sense to me. But you know, I feel like the world works in mysterious ways. And I looked at him I remember, I'm very different with my dad. Now we have like, even different conversations. And now that when I tell Bobby No, I might, you know, like immigrants, like, do whatever you want. I trust to you know, if I said that, to him, like a year goes like,

Unknown 1:03:41
What? Where are you going?

Unknown 1:03:41
What do you want to leave? Those two? What a free one? And then take me with you. Yes, I do want to be in greener pastures is like your see on a bad day on the bed. And then, but that's it. I,

Unknown 1:03:52
I would say that a lot of times, we don't really understand the psychological strength that we have until we go through this trauma. Yes. So where did it come from is that and that's what you know, I say to a lot of people that the idea is, is that a lot of times even my students like you know, I don't know, if Maddie remembers, but one of the thing I always say to my students, if you learn nothing from me, which I hope they learn something, you will always remember there is nothing you're going to go through, I don't care how traumatic it is, you will not be able to get out of it. And within understanding it. You do have this, this immune system that is created from whoever, however, and we have it but we will never know until we go through something. Yes, that's something that you had it all along, but he never really had to feed into it, of course.

Unknown 1:04:38
And yes, he never had to tap and none of us know it was it was a big test on my family. No, it was it was huge test for my brother to deal with children and to him being the only sunny note feeling like he had to take a big part in for my sister who was pregnant we haven't seen and now she has a child and she named him after my dad. Then my dad says like, I'm grateful I saw mice, my grandchild that has my name. These are old grateful. And the day she gave birth. Amazing was the week he came. And then he said the baby and it was, you know, it was even hard for us to adjust him being home. But he's like, he's so cool that that two weeks ago, I took him to the cafe. I was like, Baba, this is my spot. And the nurses lovely even with him, he helps us out because I was like, Dad, you're heavy. We can't carry you. He's in the wheelchair, having some juice and some snacks. And he's like, you guys, my butt is hurting from this wheelchair. I need a pillow. And my friends. They start laughing. I was like, yeah, I'm so sorry. My dad has no filter, by the way. But I don't care. He's like, I'm gonna fucking wheelchair you guys. I'm in a wheelchair. I put some cushion under my last, like, I lost a lot of weight. Like I was saying, how much I love you impossible. I love you so much. No wonder no wonder sarcasm where it comes from. Okay. It's from you all and on. I had to wait 34 years to realize we're not debt free. We actually so much similar. But yeah, I yeah. And it's every day. And that's what I tell him. I I know, my mom speaks to him, whatever she says, and my brother or whoever, but I come to like, Dad, this person says, Hi, this person says hi. And I called up his friends. I'm like, Hey, listen, you old folks. And all of you are crying. He's not dead. You're acting stupid. He I had to do I was like, come and visit your friend's stepson who is my best friend. He's leaving HUD on what's going on? Come visit him lift his spirits up. And then it comes like your daughter called us. And she was shouting. And he's like, yeah, that's my daughter who was supposed to be a son, but turned out a girl. That's what I was. Like, yeah, I know. I know.

Unknown 1:06:47
That's great. Because of your personality and your gender. What you have done,

Unknown 1:06:55
I would say, I mean, you are a bright personality within the community. Thank you. And I think a lot of the same.

Unknown 1:07:02
Likewise, you guys,

Unknown 1:07:03
you know, I wish we had more time. And a lot of the stuff that you do put out on Instagram is uplifting. Thank you especially like the self care things that you do the rip on education that oh, I support. I support that so much.

Unknown 1:07:19
Ah,

Unknown 1:07:21
my life we talk about this next episode. 100%. verge, please, please. I need to vent about

Unknown 1:07:29
their things I agree with. And there are things that I do disagree with? I mean, you know, definitely I don't want DJ being exposed to a classroom environment in Kuwait. Because I don't think our society is equipped mentally, yes. To deal with anything in a school. We can't even social distance properly. Yeah, let alone, send our kids to school and say, Okay, you guys are going to social distance. There are so many other different ways of doing classrooms outside. There are a lot of things that you've talked about on Instagram that I agree with, and sending kids back to school, unfortunately, and quate is something that hell I don't even think people should be going to work just because we don't know how to follow rule. Yeah, yeah.

Unknown 1:08:12
We don't know how to follow rule,

Unknown 1:08:14
whether COVID real, not real, whatever it is, Oh, we don't send

Unknown 1:08:18
ties that look. Unless you've got COVID yourself, like extra. Because of her and her family. She understands it. But I feel like here you've got to go through something yourself in order for you to empathize and to understand like, it's amazing to me, how many people struggle off or saying, Oh, come on, do you really believe in this? Or do you do this? And, and you're right. I don't think our kids can ever survive this. You're right. I but still, I want to complain. Oh,

Unknown 1:08:45
it's okay. 100%.

Unknown 1:08:47
Next time,

Unknown 1:08:48
we just did drop an episode with Do you remember Tad? Our Dr. Theodore Cruz right now? Do you remember tax Student Affairs when we were there? And he goes up to the president's office.

Unknown 1:08:59
Thanks. So I need to see a face. Yeah.

Unknown 1:09:01
He's always like by the book. Mr. Rules of a UK back in our day.

Unknown 1:09:07
Yes, yes. Yes, it is. office when you guys were there. I

Unknown 1:09:10
thought it was after that.

Unknown 1:09:11
Yeah. Yeah. It was right. When we graduated. That year, he moved up to the president's office. I thought he gave, you know, great information on online education, and especially within the Middle East, not just Kuwait. Yeah. And for listeners internationally that don't know this, quite used to be the leader in education in the GCC in the Arabian Gulf. And now we're like the furthest behind. I mean, down the list. I can you can see a sauce. Right? Yes. So everyone out there knows she absolutely rips on the system. And that is definitely a show in its own.

Unknown 1:09:49
Yes, I have to. Yeah, no, this year has been a roller coaster for me because I have to rip up the system. I could not transfer my kids to government school because their father has just transfer them even though I have custody. And even though I have custody, I don't they say that the father still has to transfer them. So that beautiful human that one day that I was married to doesn't want to transfer them to government and doesn't want to pay their private education. So I was like, really?

Unknown 1:10:13
Yeah, really? This

Unknown 1:10:15
is happening and Corona.

Unknown 1:10:18
What? Okay,

Unknown 1:10:19
I'd love to have you on just to talk about that stuff. Because it talks about I find it sickening that if God forbid, something is wrong with my son, my wife can't sign off on it. They won't allow her to sign they won't allow her father has to be a male for my family. I'm like, What the fuck, right? That's a kid's mother. Like she buried him for nine months. Yes, I was just a sperm donor, you know, like, like, it's messed up in the society like,

Unknown 1:10:45
Yeah, no, one. It's true. And it's more difficult for individuals like you and I, because I'm a single mom to, like, if I take them to a dentist at a private site, if I take them to a dentist, I have to call him here on the custodian. It's my insurance, because where I work, they go to a US which is because of my job. And do you know, when I get any notice, we need her this, we need her this? I say, okay, or whenever would they we are renewing for next year, for example, I am the mom, I am the custodian I have. I'm the CIO, and they are in that school because of a UK right? Because I work there. Do you know, and I have a paper that says I am you know, they said to me know, his, their dad has to sign a paper to be able to keep them like, you know, how every year you renew. And I'm like, that doesn't make sense. They are there because of me. But it doesn't matter. Or that I have to be able to. I mean, in the US if you are divorced, you're divorced, hello, divorce. And you've got a paper that says, you are, you know, the Guardian, you're the guardian. But it's so interesting. So next time we definitely I have I want

Unknown 1:11:55
for me and Yes, I will. I have by the way I have educational custody. But I have to wait now for the judge to give me a paper to says okay, you can take them to government because well, that's for another story. Another Yeah, it's been it's been a weird year. But I do believe everything that's happened to me and to everyone. And Well, again, I speak of me because that's the only person I know. And it has to be building me up from something greater. If not, then I'm going to be on an island on my own. And I've got it from everywhere, really,

Unknown 1:12:25
my boys have a saying back home, if it doesn't break, you just makes you stronger. So you know, it's

Unknown 1:12:32
very true. Everything does happen. It's that reason, I go through that my everyday life every day, I think of that. So I think about all the struggles and everything that I'm going through. And I realized that I'm being prepared, I truly believe that. So I don't know, if it's something I say to myself to make myself feel happy. But throughout all my long life, and it's good for both of you. It has worked for me,

Unknown 1:12:53
it's only it is truly only but a number, trust me your age, and you look wonderful. Anyone would say she's, she's glowing. And her. And if Today the topic was about Corona, I have not a lot of friends since I left the hospital, I'd like people to understand that they feared being near me. And it felt really awkward at the beginning. So I had also to have a mindset that would understand people like Thursday, going out camping, you know, catch that. And I told a couple of friends you know, to come and I'm not scared, we don't hug, we don't do kisses, who wants to hug hug it, it's fine. But my children stay away from the kids and everyone's playing far away. So do whatever you want to do, but try to abide by the rules that is put in. So just in case this just in case would take you a long way. That just in case, you know, because again, in case I have, like if I just put that option of if I didn't, or he would have what what would have happened, you know, but then everything happens to reason I connect the dots backwards, never forward because forward is I'm living in the now I don't want I know what I want. So it's going to come on its own. So I as Maddie said, maybe you might disagree on things. I'm a very let's agree to disagree with respect. You don't want to come because you're scared. I respect that you want to take precaution because you're scared of COVID you don't want to come because of any other reason I respect that. But you can't go dissing any people's feelings. You can't diss the way a person feels either it's with Corona or without you cannot. Because that's how they feel not what you feel. Do not project what you feel in them. So, yeah, take precautions, wear your mask, do whatever you want to do. I have my own opinion and all of this and other people might not and I do believe there's a virus but I don't believe it's that deadly. Because again, the whole family had it I mean like my mom, and I'm the current directory also a lot of people contact me Hello, we have Corona what to do. I'm like, you're fine. Nothing's wrong with you, or even on Instagram. We've heard your story Can you help us and I was like, Okay, this is my number call me I'm not gonna message and I do. I'm like, are you okay? Yes, I'm worried. Why are you worried? You're fine, you're healthy, you're happy. Nothing's wrong. And then I like the feedback. Thank you. You lifted their spirits. We're so happy. I'm like, yeah, every time you feel like, something is wrong, remember, look at Esther's page. They got it bad. They had it bad. They added the worst. And yeah, if that would lift your spirit up, then I'm glad I'm glad I opened my account. I'm glad I'm sharing my story. And my dad is willing to share his story because I had to it's historian then not mine. Yeah, and all of that. I'm just grateful for everything that happened. I have to be what else? My dad's alive. I am grateful. And we're grateful for you to be here and to share your Thank you.

Unknown 1:15:41
Definitely Yes. Hundred percent 100%. And definitely, I want to have you back on. Yeah. Again to talk about self care education. Yes,

Unknown 1:15:49
yeah, I will bring will bring that topic down.

Unknown 1:15:53
I want to talk to you about self promotion. Also, you're really big into that. And you have a number of clients that are out there. So for all the listeners out there, if you want to find her, you can find her on Instagram. Yes. And you know, you put out great content, whether it's about being a mom, self care, Corona, you name it. Thank

Unknown 1:16:11
you. Also on LinkedIn, on LinkedIn,

Unknown 1:16:14
I died.

Unknown 1:16:15
Professionally, I'm only

Unknown 1:16:17
on LinkedIn was that?

Unknown 1:16:18
No, actually, it's still the professional base, I still don't have my website up and running because of COVID. And I went through a lot. So I just I gave myself time to not be a workaholic. Now I'm back on track, hopefully. And I'm excited because I have many lives coming up. And it's all about the mental state. Because with everything that was happening, I didn't just let loose, I literally went to everything and did everything that I needed to do to keep myself sane, because I didn't want to lose myself. And I didn't want to break because if I break Then who's going to take care of the kids that was on the top of my mind. Something happens. Yeah. And I needed to be strong for that for the person because they're at this age where they're building their personality, and they need to build it because we don't know what the new world is coming. And I this is my believable so that they need to have like, strong base grounded and crystal children 2000 and above. They're called crystals drill and they just don't give a fuck about anything. They're fine. They're gonna be fine. They're always gonna be fine. We're the Indigo kids. We're the ones healing for ancestors and all of that. My belief Also, we're just like, we have to deal with a lot of inner child things. And as an adult, and it's just a roller coaster. Corona, for me was like, hey, come sit down. Let's do a little a lot of your issues. One by one. Oh, no, I mean, 10 by 10. To me, that's how I felt. And I'm glad I did. I'm glad I'm ready to travel alone solo and sleep in a hotel all alone. I don't want anyone with me. I'm so ready. Amazing.

Unknown 1:17:47
Amazing. I

Unknown 1:17:48
was off the checklist.

Unknown 1:17:51
Thank you so much.

Unknown 1:17:51
Thank you so much, guys.

Unknown 1:17:52
Thank you. We really appreciate queues.

Unknown 1:17:55
So that's the the finale of The Quentin Tarantino way.

Unknown 1:18:05
Thanks for listening to this episode. If you enjoyed it, please head over to iTunes to subscribe rate and leave a review. You can also find us on Instagram at the project Kuwait. Thank you and join us next time

Transcribed by https://otter.ai